Sexual coercion is widespread in the animal kingdom. Its direct forms, including harassment and forced copulation, have largely been investigated as an expression of (alternative) male reproductive strategies, rather than the result of a sexual conflict between the sexes. Likewise, the frequent occurrence of forced copulations in orang-utans (Pongo spp.) has been attributed to male strategies and more recently also to concealed female fecundity. So far, however, the immediate contextual variables leading to forced copulations have rarely been examined. We compared two orang-utan populations, Suaq (Pongo abelii, Sumatra) and Tuanan (Pongo pygmaeus, Borneo), both characterized by an individual-based fission–fusion lifestyle, whereas their socioecology differs. We assessed how the occurrence of female-resisted and voluntary copulations was affected by female reproductive state, male morph (unflanged or flanged), measures of male–male competition, male–female relationship and ecological factors. Besides female reproductive state and male morph, predictors of female resistance were related to male–male competition. First, female resistance was more likely towards subordinate males who were displaced from proximity to the female by another male during that association. Second, the presence of additional flanged males increased the probability of female resistance. Third, the latency to both the arrival of another male and to the end of the association after sexual interactions was shorter if there was female resistance. We conclude that sexual coercion in orang-utans is highly dependent on the vicinity of more dominant males and can only be understood in the light of sexual conflict: While males force copulations when at risk of losing access to a female and thus follow a ‘now-or-never’ strategy, female resistance follows a ‘not-you-now’ pattern, which is ultimately consistent with an infanticide avoidance strategy.