Two-photon transitions for hydrogen and hydrogenlike ions in arbitrary magnetic fields are investigated using currently available nonrelativistic energy levels and one-photon dipole transition probabilities. For hydrogen, the 2s-1s two-photon spontaneous-decay rate is shown to increase rapidly with the strength of the applied field from its field-free value of 8.2284 ${\mathrm{s}}^{\mathrm{\ensuremath{-}}1}$ to a maximum of 1.537\ifmmode\times\else\texttimes\fi{}${10}^{8}$ ${\mathrm{s}}^{\mathrm{\ensuremath{-}}1}$ at 1.41\ifmmode\times\else\texttimes\fi{}${10}^{6}$ T, approaching that of the 2p-1s one-photon rate, and to drop slightly to 1.055\ifmmode\times\else\texttimes\fi{}${10}^{8}$ ${\mathrm{s}}^{\mathrm{\ensuremath{-}}1}$ at 4.7\ifmmode\times\else\texttimes\fi{}${10}^{8}$ T. The transition rate is shown to scale as ${\mathit{Z}}^{4}$ for hydrogenic ions with nuclear charge Z in fields \ensuremath{\ge}3300${\mathit{Z}}^{2}$ T. The spectral distribution of the photons for the 2s-1s transition in a large field reveals interesting features including resonances due to migration of the 2${\mathit{p}}_{0}$ and 2${\mathit{p}}_{\mathrm{\ensuremath{-}}1}$ energy levels between the 1s and 2s levels and the appearance of minima resulting from destructive interference between the intermediate-state dipole terms. In the field-free case, these spectral features are only present for high-lying-state transitions, i.e., 3s-1s, 4s-1s, etc.