Reclaiming Our Missing Sexual Selves

Abstract

Objective: Our goal is to show how the Imago relationship paradigm, relates to couples presenting sexual problems. According to Imago theory, we come into the world whole and complete, with joyful aliveness and potential to grow. To thrive we need messages that support our full potential. Our energy needs to be able to flow freely through all areas of ourfunctioning: being, thinking, feeling, doing and sensing. In response to repressive messages of socialization, we become anxious about expressing parts of ourselves, which limits or overdevelops our capacity to function in some areas. These parts we’ve had to let go off, are freezed inside of us. Eventually, we will fall in love with someone who has our frozen parts alive and kicking, which makes them so very attractive. Design and Method: We’ll examine the messages we’ve received overtly and covertly, about sexuality, from our families and our culture, and begin to understand how they impact our sexual selves and sexual expression. Everything will be done dialogically according to the Imago structure Results: We will discuss and let the participants understand and experience why we are attracted to “such someone” and what happens when we take off our pink glasses. Conclusions: We shall look at the negative messages that lead to anxiety about our acceptability, and see how we get access to our lost sexual parts at the beginning of the relationship, how we lose them again during the course of the relationship, and what do we have to do in order to get them back again.