MICHAEL J. LEE Back toBlandón D won't wasborn find in on the any small map, town unless of of Blandón, coursethe a place, map it is s very safe detailed. tosay, you I won'tfindon anymap,unlessofcoursethemapisvery detailed.I enjoyeda verynormalchildhoodin Blandón,exceptforthefactthatI was an onlychild,and alonemostofthetime.I did havea sibling fora short while, a twin, actually, butitpassedawaybeforeI wasabletolearn itsnameorgender, so I neverreally considered itfamily. Growing up,I alwayshadplenty offoodandwaterto sustainme, as wellas myexpansiveimagination, whichI could retreat intowhen situations becamea little harrowing. Myfather wasn'taroundvery often, thoughhe did pop inonce in a while,usually whenhe neededa shave. Mymother, on theotherhand,tookwonderful careofme;sheworked three jobstosupport thebothofus,butifshewasoverworked, shenever showedit,exceptforonce, I remember, whenwe wereshoppingtogether on one ofherraredaysoff, andshecollapsed. In school,I hada fewacquaintances, hereandthere, andwasgenerally wellliked,as faras I knew.I was also activein severalorganizationsandclubs ,thoughI amnotcertain why. Butallinall,I wantedfor nothing, exceptfora stronger father figure, ora stay-at-home mother, or a morelong-term sibling. I'd saymoreaboutmychildhoodin Blandón and themanycomforts I enjoyedbutyoumight die ofutter boredom, andthelastthingI needright nowisanotherdeathon myhands. AttheageofeighteenI completedmyschooling, andwhileI certainly had nothing againsthigher education,I knewitwasn'tforme. I spentmostofmyfreetimehanging aroundthehousewhilemymother workedhermanyjobs. Itwas also aboutthistime,becauseI was a late bloomer, thatmybodyfinally begantomature, andas a result, I started thinking strange thoughts and doingunusualthings. Forexample,insteadofgetting outofbed inthemorning, likemostoftheworlddoes, somedaysI wouldn'tgetoutofbed at all,insteadjustlying therewith IOI thecoverspulledoverme.Sometimes, whenI wassuremymother was gone,I would playwithmyself, butmostof thetimeI justlaythere, wide-awake withmyeyesclosed,thinking aboutwhatitmight feellike tobe deceased,really becauseI hadnothing better todo. Even thoughmy mother'slove and supportwas unwavering through mydifficult phase,she did havea hard-time sharing a house withme,and toldme thatI needed to finda job,or makeotherlivingarrangements . I didn'treally knowwhattodo,butI thought thata job might be an important steptowardmaturity. So after getting outof bed one eveningand scanning variousoutlets,I discovered a company lookingto hireyoung, strong, and drivenpeoplewhowantedto travel abroad.To be honest, I didn'tcontactthemright away. I hadneverbeen outsideof Blandónbefore, and was worriedthata leap abroad,intoa completely unfamiliar country, mightoverstimulate me,and forceme backtomybed.So I wentto seemymother, whohad thenmovedinto a hotel,and toldheraboutmyfears.She insistedthatI leaveBlandón because,inheropinion,ithadgivenmeallthatitcould,interms ofeducationand nurturing, andbecausegoingabroadwouldmakemea more well-rounded person, whichwas something I verymuchwantedto be. After talking withher,I wentbackhome,and afterI hadclimbedback intobed I laytherewiththecoversoverme,repeating thewordabroad overandover, untilI fellfastasleep.When I awoke,latethenextnight, I jumpedout ofbed and contactedmyfuture employer, saying thatI exhibited allthequalitiesthey wereseeking, andwantedthejob. Whileabroad,I workedalongsidea fewotheryoungpeople,and thoughwe did not havemuchsupervision, we did do verygood and thorough work.Forexample, wealways triedtodistribute ourliterature to thelocalson time,and probably saveda good numberofsoulsthat way, I hope.Itreally wastheperfect job forme,especially whileundergoingmymaturation . The requirements werevery loose.IfI didn'tfeel likeshowing upone day, orwasviolently illfrom something I'deatenor something I'd seen,I couldalways callinsick, and nobodywouldmind. In Blandón,I alwaysfeltthatI couldonlybe one me,theme thateveryonewantedme to be,butabroadI foundthatI couldbe anyme I wantedto be. I couldbe happyorbelligerent me,sensitive or stealthy 102 me,depending on howmybodywasfeeling, andas longas I didmyjob, no one was goingto send me home.All thatfreedomI enjoyedover therekindofblewmymind,ifyouwanttoknowthetruth. I'm proudofthetimeI spentoverthere, very proud,actually My onlyrealregrets stemfrom mybehavior insomeofthemorebackwoods placesI visited, whereI didn'tactas carefully as I couldhave,mostly becauseI wasignorant ofthelocalcustoms. Andofcoursethere weretimes whenI wishedI was backin Blandón,timeswhenI wouldhavegiven anything tohavebeenbackinBlandón, lying inmybedwithmyhandson myself andthecoversovermyhead,buton thewhole,goingabroadwas exactly whatI needed;itexpandedmyhorizons atjusttheright time. I wasgivena warmwelcomewhenI returned, oratleastaswarm as possible,giventhatI was relatively unknown. A fewstrangers stood on thedockas myshippulledin,wavingtheir handsandhandkerchiefs. The onlypersonwhowasn'twaving was fishing, whichI couldn'treally blamehimor herfor, evenifI was a littleinsulted, knowing fullwell thatitdoesn'ttaketwohandstoholda rod,and evenlesstowaveatan arriving boat. I didn'thavemuchluggage withme;justtheshirt on myback,my pants, andmyshoes.Myshirt wasragged anddirty andfullofsnagsand gaping holes,butitcoveredmeintheright places.Mypantswereactuallygiventomeasa thank youbysomepeoplethatI hadstayed withwhile abroad.Atfirst I hesitated toaccepttheir gift becausethey livedinsqualor ,and didn'thaveanybusinessgiving me pantsthattheythemselves clearly needed,butafter remembering all thatI haddone forthem, all thewaysinwhichI hadeducatedthemaboutthecountry ofmybirth, I realizedthatI really diddeservesomekindofthank you,so I graciously acceptedthepants,and immediately put themon. Theywerepoorly madeandthreadbare, and therefore susceptible to thechilly winds,but itwas earlyfalland stillbalmywhen I arrivedbackin Blandón,so I didn'truntheriskofdying ofcold. Myshoes,on theotherhand,were very nice;I'd splurged on themwhileI was abroad.Theywereshiny, in 103 anadmittedly showy...