PurposeAlthough Business Process Management (BPM) is a critical issue and small- and medium-sized family firms (SMFFs) frequently adopt process organization, very little literature focuses on the processes by which family firms remain distinctive (Chrisman et al., 2016) or on their approach to BPM. The current research aims to fill this gap by analyzing dynamic companies’ attitudes to process-driven ability that concern exploitative as well as explorative processes. The purpose of this paper is to identify which kinds of dimensions may build an ambidextrous state in BPM in SMFFs, also favored by entrepreneurial IT capabilities and influenced by a stable but changeable context.Design/methodology/approachThe authors referred to vom Brocke et al.’s (2014) study as it allows a focus on BPM research in the context of SMFFs. Then, the authors adapted the framework to the context of SMFFs. In addition, an empirical analysis has been made for applying the framework’s principles on effective BPM requirements to SMFFs. In the research, the authors applied grounded theory, according to which observation and theorization are linked by circularity, as they represent moments being managed simultaneously. The theorization emerged in different moments of the empirical surveys, influencing the next data gathering and the data gathering was the object of a de-structured matching and analysis process.FindingsSpecific cultural and cognitive aspects, values and abilities affect the company behavior of SMFFs in terms of BPM, and this is influenced by the connection between the family and the business. Therefore, it confirms that the family is a missing variable in organizational research (Dyer, 2006) also in BPM. A good BPM permits the definition of business abilities of running the current processes, along with of acclimatizing the company to a changeable context. In regard to the exploitative and explorative strengths typical of organizational ambidexterity, the research favors, respectively, transactional excellence with a focus on net cost reduction and transformational excellence based on net revenue generation. This approach requires consideration of the difference between external and internal contingencies as well as of the different processes to manage. However, despite IT-based BPM tools and the new era of IT-based process thinking, technology appropriation is only one of our dimensions, and each dimension plays a role in good BPM behavior; only a combination of dimensions favors effective and flexible BPM.Research limitations/implicationsThe research contributes to the literature on BPM through theoretical implications, in particular two main implications. First, the research emphasizes the impact of familiness on good BPM practice. Family appears to be a missing variable in organizational research on BPM, even though familiness affects process specificity and mechanisms. Second, the research is based on certain category dimensions that characterize management models common in the literature, allowing the application of BPM in FFs by taking advantage of their confidence and adaptability. Limitations are related to different points of view on the model’s scope and design, the recipient and the research method.Practical implicationsThe research has two main practical implications, representing managerial potential, that improve the significance and originality of the research in internal and external contexts. In the internal context, this permits a new BPM mind-set.Originality/valueThe research is original for the following two reasons. First, when FF complexity grows and/or new organizational issues emerge, FFs are faced with two challenges: an increased number of complex processes to handle, along with a lack of IT-based BPM for organizational ambidexterity. In such a context, this research can suggest a solution. Second, the research is based on dimensions that have been widely characterized in general management models. For this reason, FFs may already be familiar with these dimensions. In addition, the model strongly valorizes the familiness impact on BPM development and takes into consideration the context awareness of the company.