How are we to understand the present malign influences on our work as managers in education, what names can we give it and what resources are there for dealing with it? In the first section I attempt a brief summary of the pressures, focusing mainly on education but including other public sector professions and discussing the pressures on management generically. My central section names and analyses the influences light heartedly, adopting the language and methodology of phenomenology of religions and describing the 'cult' of two Gods of mismanagement. I discuss the Gods in terms of their myths, practices, main adherents, structures, beliefs and spiritualities, evaluating how these characteristics banefully affect management practice. Finally, I consider sources for a healthy spirituality of management which leads us away from all this.