The Par complex polarizes the plasma membrane of diverse animal cells using the catalytic activity of atypical Protein Kinase C (aPKC) to pattern substrates. Two upstream regulators of the Par complex, Cdc42 and Par-3, bind separately to the complex to influence its activity in different ways. Each regulator binds a distinct member of the complex, Cdc42 to Par-6 and Par-3 to aPKC, making it unclear how they influence one another's binding. Here we report the discovery that Par-3 binding to aPKC is regulated by aPKC autoinhibition and link this regulation to Cdc42 and Par-3 exchange. The Par-6 PDZ domain activates aPKC binding to Par-3 via a novel interaction with the aPKC kinase domain. Cdc42 and Par-3 have opposite effects on the Par-6 PDZ-aPKC kinase interaction: while the Par-6 kinase domain interaction competes with Cdc42 binding to the complex, Par-3 binding is enhanced by the interaction. The differential effect of Par-3 and Cdc42 on the Par-6 PDZ interaction with the aPKC kinase domain forms an allosteric relay that connects their binding sites and is responsible for the negative cooperativity that underlies Par complex polarization and activity.