Hypertension month has zoomed by, and now (at the time of writing) diabetes week is upon us. Soon, cystic fibrosis, multiple sclerosis, and ulcerative colitis will slide into their respective months and weeks, and at the end of winter the hounds of heart disease will be on emphysema's traces to claim their rightful places in the Gregorian, Julian, and lunar calendars. It isn't only that time flies, but it is becoming so closely linked with disease detection. In fact, so indissoluble is the association that it seems eminently logical to rename months and even to label weeks according to the disease of their dedication. Why, indeed, stick to January or March, when Janus and Mars are long forgotten? Why hang on to July and August, when Julius Caesar and Octavius Augustus are no longer household names? The proposed change from the conventional to the Aesculapian calendar can be expected to