Should we patch our brain for better performance? In this work of philosophical short story fiction, Peter Lonsdale is the creator of a Campaign Against Intellectual Discrimination; a worldwide effort to stop discrimination of those with lower mental abilities. As part of his pursuit, he created the company CAID, which focuses on brain patches that rewire the brain for intelligence, patience, focus, and other traits. Peter, as the founder and chief evangelist for patches, has taken more than he can count, probably 100’s. When the press gets a leaked scanned of his brain, showing just how many patches “Pincushion Pete” has taken over the year, it’s a public relations nightmare. Peter is forced to resign as head of the company he founded, and reflect on how to spin the story to allow for a comeback. Whatever course he takes to orchestrate his comeback, he’s going to do it with his patches in place. Nothing is coming out.