ABSTRACT We explore the benefits of intimate reflexive encounters with a ‘critical friend’ in the context of a Participatory Action Research (PAR) project. We conceptualize these encounters as an evolving relationship between a kayaker who supports the swim (research) and the swimmer (researcher). Methodologically, we adopt a form of co-constructed autoethnography and contribute to ongoing collective approaches to reflexivity and explorations in co-writing. We demonstrate how through asking clarifying questions, probing assumptions, listening to, and validating emotions, and orienting towards solutions, a ‘critical friend’ can support the researcher in engaging in reflexive sensemaking. Overall, these intimate encounters reveal assumptions, anxieties, challenges, limitations, and a range of emotions involved in conducting PAR. The kayaker and swimmer harness the power of peer support and create spaces of collegiality to resist the growing individualization and ever-increasing pressures of academic work.