Nonlinearities in finite dimensions can be linearized by projecting them into infinite dimensions. Unfortunately, the familiar linear operator techniques that one would then hope to use often fail since the operators cannot be diagonalized. The curse of nondiagonalizability also plays an important role even in finite-dimensional linear operators, leading to analytical impediments that occur across many scientific domains. We show how to circumvent it via two tracks. First, using the well-known holomorphic functional calculus, we develop new practical results about spectral projection operators and the relationship between left and right generalized eigenvectors. Second, we generalize the holomorphic calculus to a meromorphic functional calculus that can decompose arbitrary functions of nondiagonalizable linear operators in terms of their eigenvalues and projection operators. This simultaneously simplifies and generalizes functional calculus so that it is readily applicable to analyzing complex physical systems. Together, these results extend the spectral theorem of normal operators to a much wider class, including circumstances in which poles and zeros of the function coincide with the operator spectrum. By allowing the direct manipulation of individual eigenspaces of nonnormal and nondiagonalizable operators, the new theory avoids spurious divergences. As such, it yields novel insights and closed-form expressions across several areas of physics in which nondiagonalizable dynamics arise, including memoryful stochastic processes, open nonunitary quantum systems, and far-from-equilibrium thermodynamics. The technical contributions include the first full treatment of arbitrary powers of an operator, highlighting the special role of the zero eigenvalue. Furthermore, we show that the Drazin inverse, previously only defined axiomatically, can be derived as the negative-one power of singular operators within the meromorphic functional calculus and we give a new general method to construct it. We provide new formulae for constructing spectral projection operators and delineate the relations among projection operators, eigenvectors, and left and right generalized eigenvectors. By way of illustrating its application, we explore several, rather distinct examples. First, we analyze stochastic transition operators in discrete and continuous time. Second, we show that nondiagonalizability can be a robust feature of a stochastic process, induced even by simple counting. As a result, we directly derive distributions of the time-dependent Poisson process and point out that nondiagonalizability is intrinsic to it and the broad class of hidden semi-Markov processes. Third, we show that the Drazin inverse arises naturally in stochastic thermodynamics and that applying the meromorphic functional calculus provides closed-form solutions for the dynamics of key thermodynamic observables. Finally, we draw connections to the Ruelle–Frobenius–Perron and Koopman operators for chaotic dynamical systems and propose how to extract eigenvalues from a time-series.