One of the most pervasive aspects of the Cultural war (Hunter 1991; Wolfe 1993) over family life in the 1990s and next century is over the raising of children. Daycare versus within the family for children under school age is one highly contested aspect of this battle. Because of ideological conflicts, especially over family forms and family norms (Hartmann and Spalter-Roth 1994),and because of the history and politics of attempted family policy, there is no recognizable or coherent proactive family policy in the United States (Pleck 1992) but only a regulatory function unevenly present and enforced (Maynard and McGiniss 1992). In the absence of policy-making in the United States and societal agreement that would legitimate access to a variety of types of non-family for young children, couples are forced to make individual, complex, time-consuming decisions. As a result, and with trepidation, couples rely on community and extended family to inform and legitimate their decisions. Each couple alone comes to terms with integrating two jobs and the presence of young children in the household. Ideology in the U.S leads us to expect that we are constantly exercising free-will and that we are agents acting on our preferences. This paper will demonstrate that decision-making is as much influenced by constraint as by choice. Unlike all other industrialized countries (cf. Moen. 1989; Hartmann and Spalter-Roth 1994), the U.S does not provide either universal subsidized childcare (except Headstart) at any age or paid and extended parental leave. By contrast, in European countries, between 73% and 95% of children, aged three to five, are in publicly funded daycare. Even in these countries, for children under age three is largely not subsidized and pieced together. Parents use a combination of some subsidized in-home care, cooperative arrangements among families, family daycare, and center-based for infants. The overall absence of direct childcare subsidy for infants and young toddlers is mitigated somewhat by generous parental leave policies which allow the mother or father to remain home with the child during infancy without loss of income. For example, in Sweden most children under the age of nine months have one parent at home, which is made possible by State mandated policies (Ferber and O' Farrell 1991).' Despite ideological controversy in the U.S. over who should raise the next generation of children, mothers of young children remain in the work force in dramatically large numbers (Hayes et al. 1990). Thus, daycare is a reality for most U.S. families regardless of social class (Hayes et al. 1990; Pleck 1992). Because childcare is largely not subsidized in the United States, besides rent or mortgage payments, childcare is the single largest cost couples have. However, cost is not commonly the most important factor in choices about childcare. In this study reported below, we found that childcare decisions were embedded in implicit family sentiments. We discuss changing family practices and views of motherhood, the factors couples consider in the selection of childcare arrangements, the meaning of altering the mother's role and replacing her. Then, we turn to an examination of various consequences of workplace constraints and the strategies couples develop in order to participate in daily childcare. These concerns are also addressed by the kinds of childcare options from which parents can choose. The broad range of types of childcare are represented by the couples in this study: including live-in or live-out providers (nannies or persons who are not relatives), relatives, family daycare (based in the provider's home), center-based daycare (which include centers opened from 7 to 6.30 five days a week and centers which have more restricted hours). Additionally, most families supplement their primary arrangement with other adults who provide either back-up care when a child is sick, or occupy transitional hours from primary childcare arrangements to home. …