ABSTRACT Objective The self-silencing theory explains how cultural norms can expect women to maintain their relationships by silencing their self, which can restrict voice and power in relationships, thereby potentially leading to depression. However, the literature regarding gender differences in self-silencing is inconsistent. In this study, we aimed to investigate gender and cultural differences in self-silencing in an adult community sample. Method Iranians residing in Australia (men n = 60, women n = 58) and European Australians (men n = 53, women n = 59) completed measures of self-silencing, depression and self-reported gender. Results There were no cultural or gender differences in self-silencing. Aspects of self-silencing (i.e. greater levels of divided self, r = .33, p < .001, and greater levels of externalised self-perception, r = .40, p < .001) were associated with higher levels of depressive symptoms. Gender moderated the association between care as a self-sacrifice and depressive symptoms, B = .31, SE= .14, 95%CI [.04−,58], t = 2.24, p = .026. Follow-up analyses showed that for women, higher levels of care as self-sacrifice were associated with higher levels of depressive symptoms, B = 0.17, SE = 0.09, t = 1.88, p = .06, 95% CI [<−.001,0.35]. However, for men, higher levels of care as self-sacrifice were associated with lower levels of depressive symptoms, B = −0.13, SE = 0.10, t = 1.32, p = .18, 95% CI [−0.34, 0.67]. Cultural group did not moderate any of the associations. Conclusions This cross-cultural study offers further insights regarding self-silencing in the context of depressive symptoms and provides initial insights for clinical practice.