Satire XI JUVENAL (TranslatedbyAlistairElliot) IfAtticusdinesgrandly, "Now that'sclass," We say;ifRutilus,"he's mad." The laughs Could notbe louderinthestreet: how funny Theyfindit,"an Apiciuswithoutmoney." Wherever people stopand talk,at dinners, The baths,inwaitingrooms,intheatres, The wordis "Rutilus."Thoughhe has strong Younglimbs,theirhotblood glowing,whichbelong In uniform witha helmet, now he'scarried Off,notforcedbya tribune52" (or forbidden) Butto signup on oathintosometrainer's Despoticpower,to fight inthearenas. There'slotslikehim:you see how lenderswait (Cheatedso often)at themarket gate Formenwho have one raisond'etre:theirpalate. Fortheydineevenmoreeccentrically And better, at theirlowestpointofpenury, Theirworldcracking, letting in lightalready, Soon to collapse.Butmeanwhiletheystillchase Throughall fourelements forsomenewtaste, No costprohibitive, to theirmind;and if You can look deep,you'llfindthemoreexpensive The foodwillbe,themoreitpleasesthem. So it'snothard,forthem,to raisethesum They'regoingto wastebypawningthegood plate Or fragments oftheirmother's bust,to eat Some delicacycostingthemfourhundred Offearthenware. That'show thesegourmets end at The gladiatorschoolswithresurrection pie. ARION 18.3 WINTER 20II 108 SATIRE XI It matters who itis,then:Rutilusbuys Andit'sextravagance; inVentidius' case The sameexpenditure bearsa kindofpraise Because (theysay)he'srich.SurelyI'm right In lookingdown on one who knowstheheight Of Atlasand how muchitssummit's higher Than all theotherhillsofLibya, Butcan'tsee how an ironboundstrongbox differs, How muchitdiffers, fromhislittle purse. The messageKnow Thyself came down fromheaven, Fitto be fixedand meditated on In theremembering heart,whether youseek A marriage or are longingfora seat Amongthesacredsenators - remember Thersites didn'tclaimAchilles'armour; Ulyssesdid,and looked an idiot Or ifyouaspireto be an advocate In someimportant difficult case, consider Yourcharacter, tellyourself who youare: A fiery orator, or a noisymouth,a Mere bellowerlikeCurtiusand Matho. Man mustknowhisown measure,and keepwatch On thatwhenup or down- evenwhenfishis bought, Not to wantmulletwhenyou'veonlygot Enoughfora sardineintheold wallet. Butwitha shrinking purse,a growing gullet, Whatis theway outwaitingforyou,once Yourfather's property, hisbrass,hisbronze, Have sunkintoyourstomach? - whichcan hold The rents, thefamily silver, thesheep,thefield. Andfromsuchownersthelastthingto go Is theequestrian ring,whichPollio Has losttheright to,so theempty hand He holdsout,begging, wearsno goldenband. Butgoingto thegraveunripeand bitter Is notwhathedonists fear:beingdead is better Juvenal109 Than beingold. These aretheusual steps: Moneyis borrowedin Rome; it'seatenup In front ofthosewho lentit;whenthere'slittle Or nothing leftand thecreditor looks unwell, Theydo a flit - to Baiae and itsoysters. For nowadays"leavingtheForum"* is no worse Than movingup ontotheEsquiline Out ofthehotSubura.The one pain, One sadnessofthesemenwho've fledtheplace is: For a fullyeartheymissthechariotraces In theCircus,back in Rome. And intheirfaces There'snota singledropofblood thatblushes. For Honour'sonlylaughedat now,and few Restrainheras shefleesthecitytoo. Todayyou'regoingto findout ifI manage, Persicus, to makemybeautiful sermonmatch My life,how I behave,and whatI own, IfI praisebeans butam a secretglutton, And ask forporridge ifanybody's there Butwhisper"gateaux" in theservant's ear, Because,as you'reengagedto dinewithme, You'll findinmeEvanderand you'llbe Like Heraclesdroppingin or elseAeneas, Not quiteso grand,buthalfdivineas he is, One dispatchedto thestarsfromfire, and one fromwater. Now listento mydishes - notornate Withmarketstuff - butfromTivoli(myfarm): A littlegoat,a kidling, veryplump, The tenderest intheflock,thatdoesn'tknow Whatgrassis,hasn'tdaredto nibblewillow Shootsthatdrooplow,and has lessblood thanmilk; Withwildasparagus,pickedon thehill Bythefarmer's wife,leavingforonce herspindle. Also,largeeggs,warmintheirtwistsofhay, Theirmothers too (somefowl),and lastyear'sgrapes no SATIRE XI Keptas theywere,as good as fromtheirvines, Pears,boththeSegnianand theSyriankinds; Andin thebasketstoo, fresh smelling, rivals To anyfromPiceno,there'llbe apples You neednotshrink from;there's no risk;thefrost Has driedtheautumninthem,thatraw taste. In theold daysthiswould havebeena quite Excessivebanquetevenforour Senate. Curius(thevictoroverPyrrhus) usedto pick Fromhissmallplotand on a brief firecook His meal ofgreenshimself, whichnowadays A dirty slave,digging thefieldsinchains, Wouldpushaway,remembering thetaste Of tripein somehotfood-place.In thepast The customwas, a saddleofdrypork Hung up on theopen rackforfeastdays,bacon To feedtherelatives as a birthday treat, Andperhapsa shareofthesacrifice, somefresh meat Ifitwas animal,and bigenough. To sucha feastone oftherelatives (Who'd beenthreetimesa consul,commandedlegions In thefield,and was dictator once) Wouldcome down soonerthanusual,shouldering His mattock, fromthehighfieldhe'd beentaming. Butwhentheywereall trembling at someFabius Or other, harshCato, or theScauruses, Or Fabricius, whenevena censordreaded The moralstrictness ofhisrigidcolleague, Nobody worried, or thought itserious, To ask whatturtle swimming intheseas Of Oceanus,would makea showyhigh-class end To a dining-couch to suittheold beau monde Of Troy,now toffs in Rome. The couchesthen Weresmall,and had no decorationon The side;thehead was bronze,a donkey'shead Juvenalhi WearingthewreathofBacchus,roundwhichplayed Some country people dancingin a ring. Theirfood,and house,wereliketheirfurnishing. A Roman soldierat thatearlydate Was rough,unableto appreciate The artsofGreece,and in a conqueredcity...