Writing into relationships

Abstract

Social network change is often accomplished through communicative efforts but seldom studied as such. This article studies communicative efforts at tie change as expressed in interpersonal notes between adolescents. Communicative efforts bring about tie change by identifying perceived relational problems and social corroboration with surrounding actors, dyads and contiguous events. This pressures others to respond in ways that form, maintain, revise, or dissolve relationships. Social corroboration is sought through a process with several identifiable stages. First, writers describe a relational scene composed of perceived interpersonal stances between actors. Within the scene, some stances are clearly defined, enacted, felt, and/or socially confirmed, suggesting stable ties. Other stances are uncertain and reflect focal problems in need of relational work, becoming the focal story in the relational scene. Second, writers present stories in an attempt to motivate audience response by revealing the writer’s intention, by assigning undesirable identities to select actors, and by implicating some tie changes as (in)appropriate to the scene. Last, audiences respond to these notes with their own communication, either affirming and aligning relations in ways that move desired tie changes toward actualization, or redefining the story in ways that require additional exchanges. In this manner individuals write their way into relationships.