My Uncle and the Fat Lady

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My Uncle and the Fat Lady Ernest J. Gaines (bio) Me and Toby were shooting marbles in the front yard, and every time I stood up I saw Uncle Murphy whispering in Miss Pearl Anne's ear. I would get down on my knees and shoot again, and if I missed, I would stand up and there he was whispering in Miss Pearl Anne's ear again. Uncle Murphy and Miss Pearl Anne were in the front room, and Miss Pearl Anne was sitting in the rocking chair. Uncle Murphy was moving from one side of the chair to the other, whispering in Miss Pearl Anne's ear. Grandma was back in the kitchen, and she didn't know what was going on up front. And Uncle Murphy just kept on. (You see, Uncle Murphy was Grandma's brother, and Miss Pearl Anne was Grandma's good friend, and he always came down the quarters when he knowed Miss Pearl was visiting Grandma. He was married, just like Miss Pearl Anne was married, but he didn't care. If he knowed Miss Pearl Anne was going to be at Grandma's house, he was going to show up. I didn't like it. I didn't like it a bit. But I was a little boy, and what could I do about it?) I got down on my knees and shot, and when I stood up, there he was at it again, from one ear to the other ear. Miss Pearl Anne would wave her hand like she was waving at a gnat or a mosquito or a fly, but Uncle Murphy would just shift to the other ear. Over and over and over. Then when I stood up one time I saw that Miss Pearl Anne had left the rocking chair, and headed down the walk toward the toilet, but she didn't go in the toilet, she crossed the ditch and went into the cane field. "Shoot up," Toby said to me. I got down on my knees and got a marble, then I shot again and missed. When I stood up I saw my Uncle Murphy going down the walk toward the toilet, but he did just like Miss Pearl Anne did, he went by the toilet and crossed the ditch into the cane field. "You go'n shoot Marbles?" Toby said to me. I got down and shot and missed, and I told Toby I had to go to the toilet. "How come you have to go to the toilet every time I'm winning—hanh? "Because I have to go," I said. "I ain't go'n do my business on myself." "Every time I'm winning you go'n do something on yourself—every time I'm winning." I hurried back to the toilet and closed the door, and I could hear my Uncle Murphy and Miss Pearl Anne talking low. Then they got quiet, then I heard my Uncle Murphy grunting, just a grunting. I didn't hear nothing from Miss Pearl Anne, but I heard my uncle—just a grunting. It went on quite like that, then it was quiet. It stayed quiet for a little while, then I heard Miss Pearl Anne saying, "Help me up from here." It was quiet a little, then I heard my Uncle Murphy saying, "You got to push a little bit." And I heard Miss Pearl Anne saying, "You got your belly fully, you done got weak—I'm pushing." [End Page 684] Uncle Murphy said, "Wait, let me try from the back. Sit up some, and I'll push from the back. Then he said, "You got to sit up more. Sit up more." Miss Pearl Anne said, "I'm sitting up much as I can. You better help me get up from here. Your belly full, you done got weak, hanh?" And my uncle saying, "You got to try to stand up when I push. Now, I'm pushing, I'm pushing." I could tell from his voice he was pushing hard. Then I heard him saying, "Lord, have mercy." And Miss Pearl Anne saying, "Lord have mercy –some nothing. You better help...