Abstract

This creative-critical personal essay unpacks the structural mechanisms and invisible biases that allow gendered violence and the whore stigma to flourish. I embody my role as unsympathetic victim-survivor of sexual assault, refusing to conform to societal pressures around virtue and propriety. Resisting the temptation to point the finger at any one perpetrator, I explore the co-option of women’s bodies and my demons with a subversive literary arsenal, using humor, volatility and disruption as weapons. This essay-in-fragments explores consent culture, objectification and the commodification of my body as I engage in transactional sex and sex for pleasure, with an aim to subvert expectations around sex workers, who are often accused of “asking for” rape.

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