Learning Shame, Learning Fear

Abstract

Abstract Drawing on the concept of socializing emotions, I compare emotionally charged childrearing practices in two urban contexts. In Helsinki, shame is regularly evoked in children when they behave inappropriately; in Santa Marta, fear is a more common emotional experience in such cases. I argue that these distinct emotional experiences guide children to learn the particular ways of relating to others that are deemed appropriate in each context. The experience of shame in Helsinki promotes children learning compliant autonomy and guides them to learn to avoid overt interpersonal hierarchies. In Santa Marta, fear orients children towards learning and enacting respectful obedience in their everyday interactions, and they learn to manage and navigate within overt interpersonal hierarchies in normative ways.