ABSTRACT In this paper, the author further explores and theorises themes from a recent autoethnographical essay ‘Dangerous journey: memories of containment in Cuba’ in which he detailed the immediate demanding period that followed the end of his own analysis – an event which occurred some time after the completion of his formal training. To study this very particular time-period in professional life, he draws on literature on endings in child psychotherapy and the progression of personal training analyses in the psychoanalytic professions, while also referencing discussions held with a range of child psychotherapy colleagues. The reader of this paper is invited to enquire why there are no child psychotherapy publications and a near-void in wider psychoanalytic publications on this important caesura, coupled with a lack of descriptions of the challenges of working in current NHS systems. The author also draws on his experiences to provide a brief, general commentary on such challenges. He hopes that the paper may encourage further writing in the profession on the place of personal analyses within (and often for a time after) the training – especially the possible meanings when ending them – and more broadly of their enduring place in the lives of child psychotherapists post-terminus.
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