Abstract We develop a general theory of flows in the space of Riemannian metrics induced by neural network (NN) gradient descent. This is motivated in part by recent advances in approximating Calabi–Yau metrics with NNs and is enabled by recent advances in understanding flows in the space of NNs. We derive the corresponding metric flow equations, which are governed by a metric neural tangent kernel (NTK), a complicated, non-local object that evolves in time. However, many architectures admit an infinite-width limit in which the kernel becomes fixed and the dynamics simplify. Additional assumptions can induce locality in the flow, which allows for the realization of Perelman’s formulation of Ricci flow that was used to resolve the 3d Poincaré conjecture. We demonstrate that such fixed kernel regimes lead to poor learning of numerical Calabi–Yau metrics, as is expected since the associated NNs do not learn features. Conversely, we demonstrate that well-learned numerical metrics at finite-width exhibit an evolving metric-NTK, associated with feature learning. Our theory of NN metric flows therefore explains why NNs are better at learning Calabi–Yau metrics than fixed kernel methods, such as the Ricci flow.