IMPACT STATEMENT This article shows how management consultancy firms, particularly the Big Four, leveraged their position to become key brokers in English higher education, expanding their influence across multiple areas of governance and management. Aided by legislative changes designed to promote competition and enable for-profit providers to capture the rents provided by public higher education, these firms promote forms of marketization and privatization that are radically re-purposing the mission of the public university. Unbundling and financialization of university assets is central to that project. The article reveals how consultancy firms used the Covid 19 crisis not only to increase their influence but, through a series of ‘crisis narrative’ reports, to advocate strategies for fundamentally altering the entire public university system, locking in permanent changes and structures of managerialism that are anathema to the principles of public higher education. The article is a warning to policy-makers to beware the free-market fantasies and self-serving scenarios that these consultancy firms advocate.