Grid integration of distributed energy resources (DERs) is vital to provide flexibility services, required to ensure efficient system operations at both transmission and distribution levels. To prevent negative interactions between transmission system operators (TSO) and distribution system operators (DSOs) while procuring flexibility services from DERs, it is imperative to prioritize them. However, for system's cost-effectiveness allocating DER flexibility to the operator with the highest need is preferable rather than giving upfront priority. To address this, a novel coordinated decision-making approach for a common TSO-DSO market is proposed. This approach considers global balancing for the TSO and distribution congestion management for the DSO as objectives, using them as deciding factor to allocate DER flexibility to the system operator with the greatest need to fulfil its objective. Results show proposed method enhances DSO's flexibility transfer to TSO and maintains reactive power at T-D interface. Gap between TSO's DER flexibility needs and availability, influenced by congestion and line losses, is critical for prioritization. Specifically, network capacity and line losses constitute 18.79 % and 3.42 % of offered DER flexibility, respectively. Reactive power deployment improves Q/P ratio, reducing standard deviation from 0.19 to 0.018. Framework reduces conflicts, provides clear flexibility allocation rules without upfront priority.