Abstract Child soldier disarmament, demobilization and reintegration (DDR) practice has a strong normative commitment to protect children from harm and violence. However, there exist policy and research knowledge gaps in comprehending the translation of such norms in meeting the social and protective needs of children. In Sri Lanka from 2009, 594 former child soldiers from the Liberation Tamil Tigers of Elam (LTTE) underwent a national rehabilitation programme. National engagement with international child protection norms could not materialize from a militarized governance framework implemented at the end of the civil war. This article provides a primary source of data based on 45 semi-structured interviews with former boy and girl child soldiers from the LTTE. The Sri Lankan case-study demonstrates that the DDR programme resulted in the re-calibration of social and political control over child and adult participants. Former child soldiers' social and protective needs therefore remain complex and unresolved because of state generated structural violence related to poverty and militarization. The article advances a framework to account for a generational power dynamic of adult-child relations, and the politics of institutionalized protection to account for children's formal rehabilitation and return experiences.