Confronting Heterosexism Ilka Scobie (bio) Funeral Diva Pamela Sneed City Lights http://www.citylights.com 160 Pages; Print, $11.87 Now is a moment when we crave bravery and inspiration. Pamela Sneed’s much acclaimed Funeral Diva provides both, as well as provocative explorations of race, gender, rage, compassion, and love. The poet, a remarkable performer, manages to replicate the energy and immediacy of her live readings in this volume. Equal doses of self-examination and refreshing self-deprecation are juxtaposed in her exhilarating prose and poetry. Confident, charming, original and blessed with keen self-awareness, Sneed’s voice articulates her reality as a proud Black, lesbian, and adopted daughter. Her introductory chapter is a traumatized child’s travelogue, who grows up to be a punk adventurer, world traveler, bohemian, educator, and committed artist and activist. The book begins with “History,” a prose memoir. With admirable Bodhisattva compassion, Sneed is able to forgive a birth mother who abandoned her, an adoptive and unstable mother who abruptly left, and an adoptive family whose suburban household was violent and unloving. Detailing an early love affair, she says she is unable to leave, “So I stayed… doing drugs and hurting myself.” Sneed recognizes she was unable to leave as “I couldn’t do someone what was done to me.” “My father was a monster I know,” she writes in a memorial to her first adopted mother, “Ruth Vick.” And the adult Pamela is able to recognize, “I know now in retrospect she was fleeing / for her life / from abuse/ She tried to take me / but that failed.” She is even able to extend forgiveness to an old friend “who heap damage on you and act as if it never happened.” And who leaves her in a loft where she feels “naked and afraid.” As a young student Sneed recognizes, “The home I cried out for was not my parent’s house, but a warm place in me.” “Life changing” travels to the Caribbean, Africa, and Europe expand her vision, and she lands in New York. “In fact, if my life were divided into halves, I would label them pre- and post-Ghana.” After the first compelling chapter, the engaging prose leaps from adolescent love affairs to “Ila” meditations on her true birth name, “because for child adoptees, birth names are fictitious.” With help from her mother, she legally changes her name to Pamela, “because it had the ring of a princess.” Thus, Ila becomes Pamela, “leaving my name like a country of birth behind.” Following the recognition that her chosen name has truly become her moniker is the long title poem “Funeral Diva”. Sneed powerfully documents an urban counter cultural history that begins in the 1980’s, the same decade that I returned to New York and confronted the ever burgeoning AIDS epidemic. Deeply immersed in emerging Black queer culture, Sneed says, “We were in formation. / We were making ourselves.” Sneed is not describing a fashion victim’s romantic comedy fag-hagdom. Instead, she traces her growth as an “activist and founder” in “These were early days, AIDS in its infancy.” Documenting a Black male literary collective, Other Countries, she declares, “I saw each collective member as a brother. / In return I became their sister.” The self declared “Funeral Diva” “became a known and requested presence operating throughout the crisis. / … called for at memorials, readings, wakes and funerals to speak / give testimony and credence to men’s lives.” Sneed memorializes and documents a decimated creative community that was lost too young, “a generation no longer here.” Sneed becomes the one who learns to “accurately portray and pay homage to the spirit of someone / who’d lived only for a short time upon this planet.” Amid a battalion of prejudice, fear and disinformation, people — at first, mostly beautiful young men — battled a fatal and little understood new disease. I watched lifelong friends transmute from frivolous hedonists to courageous caretakers. I saw friends abandoned by their families and then nurtured by lifesaving community networks. Organizations like Visual Aids and ACT UP rose to focus on a health crisis the government ignored. Sneed gives dramatic voice and clear vision to the history of those...
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