“You shouldn’t feel this way!” Children’s and adolescents’ interpersonal emotion regulation of victims’ and violators’ feelings after social exclusion

Abstract

Emotion regulation is a key developmental skill, but very few studies have investigated developmental differences in how children and adolescents regulate the emotions of others (interpersonal emotion regulation). This study examined developmental differences in interpersonal emotion regulation in the context of social exclusion. Ninety-one 5- and 9-year-old children and 13-year-old adolescents were presented with two straightforward social exclusion scenarios, where a victim was excluded because of an irrelevant characteristic, and one multi-faceted scenario, where exclusion can be justified by social-conventional reasons. Participants judged social exclusion as more acceptable in the multifaceted scenario based on social-conventional and personal-choice reasons. Nine- and 13-year-olds were more likely to change the emotions of victims and excluders and most commonly used behavioural interpersonal emotion regulation strategies. Overall, children and adolescents engage in efforts to improve victims’ and worsen excluders’ emotions in social exclusion situations.