Who's Going to Make the First Move? Pluralistic Ignorance as an Impediment to Relationship Formation

Abstract

Six studies were conducted to test the hypothesis that individuals contemplating `making the first move' in initiating a romantic relationship experience pluralistic ignorance (N = 544). Studies 1 and 2 established the preconditions for the phenomenon: participants indicated that they were more likely than a potential partner to be inhibited from making an initiative by a fear of rejection. Studies 3 and 4 demonstrated pluralistic ignorance: although participants explained their own inaction in terms of their fear of being rejected, they attributed a potential partner's inaction to a lack of interest in developing a relationship with them. Study 5 utilized an open-ended thought-listing measure to demonstrate that individuals spontaneously perceive a potential partner's inaction as reflective of disinterest more so than they perceive their own inaction in these terms. Finally, Study 6 provided more definitive evidence that participants' divergent perceptions of their own vs their potential partner's underlying feelings stemmed from the biased interpretation of inaction. Implications for the formation of social bonds are discussed.