The sex lives of asexuals

Abstract

This chapter shines the light on Asexuality, The Invisible Orientation. It is often erroneously conflated with reduced libido and so is treated by the psychotherapeutic professions as a problem to be solved or as a sign of pathology. While there is still almost no research in the therapeutic literature about asexuality, this hugely neglected area of work impacts at least 1% of the population. Most practitioners are woefully unprepared by training courses to understand this client group and as a result collude with societal norms around ‘compulsory sexuality’. Research shows that 10% of asexual individuals have been either offered, or have had, conversion therapy to ‘correct’ or change their sexual orientation, which is a higher proportion than for any other sexual orientation. It has been widely supposed that asexual people have little interest in, or need for, physical intimacy, when in fact most seek deep connections with others. This chapter will help therapists sensitively explore current sexual, sensual and intimate practices for both solo and partnered asexuals. Russell will offer ideas for increasing intrapersonal and interpersonal sensuality and intimacy between partners that decentralise genital sexuality.