The Longer it is, the Closer One Feels: Perception of Emotional Closeness to the Partner, Relationship Duration, Sexual Activity, and Satisfaction in Married and Cohabiting Persons in Norway

Abstract

This study explores the connection between relationship duration and feelings of closeness in Norwegian men and women, and the association with sexual satisfaction and activity. A sample of 4160 Norwegians aged 18–89 years was enrolled from a randomly selected web panel of 11,685 Norwegians. This study focused on participants who were married or cohabiting (1432 men, 1207 women). Closeness was the highest for men and women who had been with their partner for 0−6 years. However, among those who had been with their partner for 31 years or longer, men felt closer to their partners than women. Irrespective of relationship duration, the most important factor for both men and women’s perceived closeness with their partner was general sexual satisfaction. Among men who had lived with their partner for 7−20 years and 31 years or longer, having been monogamous in life was significantly associated with “inclusion of others in the self” (IOS). Further, closeness was associated with higher intercourse frequency, lower masturbation frequency, and satisfaction with genital appearance in men who had been with their partners for 31 years or more. Intercourse frequency was significantly associated with IOS in women who had been with their partner for 0−6 years. Furthermore, in women who had been with their partner for 31 years or more, satisfaction with their own weight was important for IOS. In conclusion, men and women reported similar degrees and patterns of IOS up to the point where they had been in their relationship for more than 30 years. Thereafter, women reported feeling less close to their partners, while men’s feelings of closeness increased. This may be related to physiological, psychological, and social changes in the lives of aging men and women.