Abstract

SUMMARY A history of emotional and physical abuse, either in childhood or as part of a military or paramilitary experience, can profoundly affect a man's desire and capacity for intimacy and negotiation in long term relationships. Common consequences of abuse, such as observational learning of abusive behavior, identification with the aggressor, or fear of acting like the aggressor, are described in terms of their potential impact on couples. Examples are drawn from men with histories of abuse in childhood or in the military.

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