Self-compassion moderates associations between distress about sexual problems and sexual satisfaction in a daily diary study of married couples

Abstract

Sexual problems, including problems with desire, subjective arousal, initial physiological arousal, maintenance of physiological arousal, pain, and orgasm are associated with personal distress and sexual dissatisfaction. Self-compassion facilitates psychological adjustment to distressing events, and therefore we predicted that self-compassion would buffer negative effects of distress about sexual problems on sexual satisfaction in 125 mixed-sex married couples over 21 days. Individuals’ daily distress about sexual problems was negatively associated with their own and partner’s daily sexual satisfaction. Individuals’ baseline self-compassion was positively associated with their own daily sexual satisfaction, and husbands’ (but not wives’) self-compassion was positively associated with their partner’s daily sexual satisfaction. Only husbands’ self-compassion moderated associations; specifically, husbands’ distress about sexual problems was negatively associated with their daily sexual satisfaction when self-compassion was low and there was no association when self-compassion was high. The same pattern of results was observed for husbands’ distress about desire, subjective arousal, and orgasm. A different pattern emerged for cross-partner effects; there was no association between husbands’ distress about sexual problems and wives’ daily satisfaction when husbands’ self-compassion was low, but there was a negative association when husbands’ self-compassion was high. The same pattern was observed for husbands’ distress about subjective arousal, pain, initial physiological arousal, and maintaining physiological arousal. Thus, husbands’ self-compassion buffers the negative effects of distress about sexual problems on their own sexual satisfaction but potentiates the negative effects of distress on partner outcomes.