Abstract
This article, by illustrating coming-out stories of lesbians and their families, inspired by and extending Amy Brainer’s theorization of LGBT family of origin relationships based on her studies in Taiwan, critically revisits the dominant coming-out discourses in the LGBT activism and research in contemporary mainland China. I first argue that, although the belief that the Western-rooted idea of coming out and Chinese family traditions are incompatible is influential within China’s LGBT activist circles, what is seldom recognized is that “chugui”, the Chinese translation of “coming out”, has already become a local term. However, grassroots but creative definitions of “chugui”, such as “to cultivate a better parent-child relationship”, is rejected by LGBT activist elites. I then point out an imbalance in China’s LGBT research that mainly pays attention to strategies of not coming out to parents, which actually underestimates parents’ agency and even otherizes parents in the name of “filial piety”. Rather, the emerging liberalistic ideal of family relationships, especially mother-daughter relationships, enables coming-out practices to become intersubjective journeys for both LGBT children and their parents to rethink gender and sexuality. Finally, I criticize the narrowly defined “family”, or “home”, in China’s dominant coming-out discourses, which disproportionately focuses on one’s family of origin and presumes it as a heteronormative fortress. I call for studies that recognize queer empathy and solidarity in a family of origin and connects one’s experiences in her family of origin with her later life in chosen families, which may be the family of origin of her child(ren).
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