Reflecting on Our Loss: Grieving and Learning Together—A School Community Faces Suicide

Abstract

We work in a seventh and eighth grade middle school in a suburb of Chicago. At our school, we have built a community of learners in which we share a deep commitment to a progressive, child-centered approach to education. As stated in our district’s philosophy document, we believe that “a school must be a place where cooperation, compassion, and responsibility are taught and exercised, where self direction and problem solving are consistently fostered and self esteem is nurtured. These experiences enable young people to develop confidence in their own skills and abilities as well as a concern for others” (Winnetka Public Schools, 1999). Through shared leadership, teachers, students, and parents have a direct say in many aspects of our school. Together we explore new curricula, assessment practices, and school rules; we plan teach-ins; and we challenge ourselves to step outside the taken-for-granted and create new ways of looking at and acting upon the world. In this way, we all understand that “democracy means a community that is always in the making” (Greene). In the spring of 2004, our community experienced the tragic suicide of Erika, an eighth grade student. The following is an exchange between school Principal Dan Schwartz and teacher/advisor Linda Bachta reflecting on the challenges faced by the school community in the wake of this tragedy. These reflections were written approximately one year after Erika’s death, giving Dan and Linda enough time to heal and consider lessons learned during those difficult days.