“Pick-Me” Black women: tactical patriarchal femininity in the Black manosphere

Abstract

ABSTRACT This essay analyzes anti-feminist (“Pick-Me”) Black women content creators on YouTube who exist within the Black manosphere—online spaces populated by Black men who support Black patriarchal dominance. These “Pick-Me” content creators use what I term “tactical patriarchal femininity” to attract the financial provision of an economically stable Black man and to derive income from sympathetic viewers. Tactical patriarchal femininity is an elaborate, all-consuming embodied performance that is as much about emotion work as it is about exuding conventional attractiveness and behavior that is aligned with traditional femininity. Tactical patriarchal femininity exists to combat the matrices of oppression created by capitalism, white supremacy, and institutional patriarchy. Anti-feminist Black women work in reaction to the misogynoirist material realities that victimize Black women. Ultimately, the Black manosphere’s explicit disavowal of Black women’s worth, apart from what they may provide for men in their role as a patriarchalized wife, is dangerous to all Black women—including and especially those Black women who claim anti-feminism. Anti-feminism does not combat dehumanizing views that posit Black women as masculine, unmarriageable, and underserving of care and support. Rather, anti-feminist Black women work to make themselves exceptions to the rule in a bid for conditional respect and protection that rarely materializes long-term.