PEDIATRICS

Abstract

There's no business like pediatrics. It's not the Cadillac of the medical specialties, but it holds many deeper rewards. Our patients still view the world with awe, and believe in us and Santa Claus. They haven't learned rich or poor, black or white. They're growing instead of declining, and haven't yet found the degenerative diseases. They know when the newest Walt Disney is in town, what the plot is, what the ending is, and how to wheedle us into taking them. They turn off their tears when mission is accomplished. Their youthful enthusiasm is contagious, and if you're not careful, they'll sprinkle you with the fountain of youth. They'll go to school with a temp. of 103, because it's picture day. What the teacher says is gospel, straight from the top. They'll make you laugh during the school play, and weep at the teacher conference. They cart old milk cartons off to kindergarten, and mysteriously return with your Christmas gift. You'll open it first, look surprised, and feel very proud. They'll squeeze every present under the tree, and ask, "Is this one for me?" Halloween is their Mardi Gras, and when they don those masks and costumes, they're monster, ghost or vampire, and you'd better be scared. They still haven't deduced who disposed of that bag of goodies they tricked and treated for. They will listen to you read the same story over and over, and you don't dare skip any pages. Cartoons are their passion, and you could do a spinal tap while Bugs Bunny weaves his magic spell.