Part Two: Gender, Religion and Nationalism in the Grieving Process

Abstract

This chapter deals with Gender, religion and nationalism in the grieving process, treats the grieving process experienced by Palestinian parents in terms of the interplay of gender, religion and national feeling. Examining this intersection of religion, politics and gender, we can learn more about how the interplay of values, norms and social and religious beliefs shapes the character of Palestinian bereavement. The gender differences between the coping patterns of fathers and those of mothers are very apparent here. Mothers used different strategies to meet and deal with the pain of their loss, including mysticism and redirecting their anger inward, whereas the men tended to use rationalization as a way of coping and directed their anger outward. Palestinian mothers spoke in a different voice than did Palestinian fathers about the way they understood death. Notably, the voice of the grieving mothers drew its content from religious faith and from social and traditional beliefs, yet managed to remain distinct from the expression of grief on the part of Palestinian fathers. The fathers’ voice was clear, rational, less uncertain and better formulated, and involved less of an internal struggle regarding the death of a child, compared with Palestinian mothers whose voice was more uncertain, less confident and with a more tenuous connection to reality.