Parental experience of launching one’s child, for those who suffered the loss of a parent during their own launching phase

Abstract

The study explores the phenomenon of launching a child from a parents’ perspective, focusing on a subgroup of parents (all mothers) whose own parent died during their own launching phase. Six female participants engaged in three interviews, reflecting on their present and past processes. Feelings such as sadness, anger, and notably fears and personal insecurities were observable in the present. Many described their children as having struggles in daily living, and all placed a priority on working through challenges, and remaining connected even post launch. These aspirations were in marked contrast to memories of their own launch, largely alone, regardless which parent died or their quality of relationship. Being witnessed during the interview process brought grief to the surface and also brought hopeful feelings and potentially mobilized self-strivings. Psychoanalytically informed discussion explores impacts of parental death during launch, considers bereavement over time and effect on subsequent generations, considers consequences of absent parents on participants’ development and names lost launch.