Motivational Models for Spontaneous Reunification With the Alienated Child: Part II

Abstract

Four motivational models explaining the dynamics of spontaneous reunification between the rejected parent and the alienated child are described. The models demonstrate how crisis can be a change agent for breaking a stalemate between high conflict parents. Within the culture of divorced and separated families, reunification between a rejected parent and an alienated or estranged child is surrounded by popular mythology. Well-meaning friends and relative's tender advice to this parent, telling him, “Wait until the child is eighteen. One day your child will come to her senses and call.” This well-intended counsel is usually offered to soften the despair the parent senses when he or she bares their heart looking for hope for the return of a lost child. Yet, paradoxically, the rejected parent cannot afford to completely release all hope for reunification. The parent is not only losing a child but is losing the pride and social status of being a loving parent.