Marriage on the Border: Love, Mutuality, and Divorce in the Upper South during the Civil War by Allison Dorothy Fredette

Abstract

Reviewed by: Marriage on the Border: Love, Mutuality, and Divorce in the Upper South during the Civil War by Allison Dorothy Fredette Angela Esco Elder (bio) Marriage on the Border: Love, Mutuality, and Divorce in the Upper South during the Civil War. By Allison Dorothy Fredette. (Lexington: University Press of Kentucky, 2020. Pp. 298. $40.00 cloth) Telling a sister-in-law that one loves another woman's "little finger better than he did his wife's whole body" is typically not a smart decision, if one desires a happy marriage (p. 2). Unfortunately for Amanda Trimble, happiness would prove elusive after she wed Ephraim, leading her to file for divorce in 1867. Dozens of neighbors testified to Ephraim's adultery, broadcasting intimate details of their [End Page 88] relationship before the court. Ultimately, Amanda received her divorce. Marriage on the Border offers an analysis of white marriages in Kentucky, West Virginia, and Appalachian Virginia, from the late antebellum era through early Reconstruction. Allison Dorothy Fredette argues that "ultimately, their hybrid border culture allowed citizens of this region to establish and maintain relationships built on mutuality, contractualism, and individualism, alongside a hierarchical slave system" (p. 7). The unique culture of the nineteenth century border region, characterized by adaptability, shines in this story. The study is supported by divorce records, diaries, correspondence, prescriptive literature, and speeches. Fredette divides her book into seven chapters, organizing those into two parts. The first, "Before the Storm," explores the making and breaking of marriages in the antebellum era. Her research reveals that four counties, "with weaker ties to slavery," granted more divorces than other counties with higher enslaved populations (p. 82). Two counties in eastern Virginia, by contrast, leaned into the idea that mastery, both in marriage and in slavery, "remained vital to the structure of society" (p. 82). If women could break the marriage contract what other social ties might be broken? Fredette argues that "in eastern Virginia, residents rejected many aspects of the mutuality and contractualism so sought after by their border neighbors in Kentucky and western Virginia" (p. 100). Instead of being more likely to see a marriage as a relationship built on mutual needs and interests, Fredette contends that many in eastern Virginia defined it as an arrangement in which women received support from their husbands, in exchange for obedience. The second section, "Weathering the Storm," carries readers through the Civil War and Reconstruction. The antebellum idea of marriage as a contract, between two consenting equals, made postwar divorces increasingly possible in the border region. Ohio County, West Virginia, for example, saw a rise of 300 percent in divorce petitions, while "eastern Virginians decried the breakdown of racial [End Page 89] mastery, connected it with potential disruptions to their hierarchical households, and demanded obedience and loyalty from both formerly enslaved people and spouses" (p. 151). Even as courtships aspired to love, respect, and mutuality, patriarchal authority remained firmly rooted in most white southern homes. Fredette's use of local records is particularly strong, exemplified by her thorough examination of the circuit courts of six counties (two in Kentucky, one in West Virginia, and three in Virginia). This leaves ample ground for future study, though, as scholars turn to additional counties to see if the patterns Fredette's research unearthed hold true. Analyzing divorce reveals the expectations of spouses for a marriage, as well as the values of their communities. The result is a book that will be of interest to scholars of the border region as well as those in gender studies. Scholars have explored how the Civil War, and emancipation, affected marriages. Fredette's addition of divorce in the border region is a much-appreciated advancement to the conversation. Angela Esco Elder ANGELA ESCO ELDER is assistant profesor of history at Converse College. She is the author of Love and Duty: Confederate Widows and the Emotional Politics of Loss (forthcoming). Copyright © 2021 Kentucky Historical Society