Lifecourse Parenting: The Primary Intergenerational Relationship

Abstract

The parent-child dyad is not only the first and primary intergenerational relationship, it is a microcosm of larger society. In this era of rapid social change, many of the challenges of contemporary family life are paralleled as multiple cohorts attempt to shape public policy, share scarce resources, educate and care for one another. These relationships, at both the family and cohort levels, bring not only challenges, but great opportunity for enriching lives and addressing perennial social problems. Although the focus of this paper is on the parent-child dyad across the adult lifespan, it is set in the context of rapid social change and provides themes and implications applicable at multiple levels.The quality of intergenerational relationships is affected by the structural circumstances of both parents and children (Umberson, 1992). In an effort to explore some of these circumstances, trends in marital satisfaction and parental well-being, divorce, and co-residence patterns will be reviewed. A second purpose of this paper is to suggest implications within an interdisciplinary framework, focusing on both scholarly application and professional practice. Finally, five broad themes are suggested, which not only characterize and summarize the current state of family intergenerational relationships, but may provide greater understanding of intergenerational relationships at the societal level.Parenting is indeed the first and primary intergenerational relationship, and it is unique in its permanence and involuntary nature (Umberson, 1992). If one generalization about parenting over the life course can be made, it is that it is dramatically changing. One source of this change is the duration of the relationship. Women who bear sons at age 25 today are more likely to have those sons alive when they are 80 (87 percent) than women in 1900 were to have their sons survive the first two years of life (82 percent). If that child is a daughter, a higher proportion will have survived at mother's age 90 (86 percent) than survived the first two years in 1900 (Uhlenberg, 19961). In a discussion of the implications of the aging of society, Dychtwald (1989) points out that ten percent of seniors have children over 65. These rather startling examples of current longevity illustrate that child-parent relationships spanning 50-plus years are becoming increasingly common (Rossi & Rossi, 1990). Additionally, at least half of these years is often spent with both generations as parents, which influences the nature of the relationship (Hagestad, 1988). Beyond the active parenting years for both generations, the mother-daughter relationship is particularly salient, as they often grow old together, with one or both being divorced or widowed (Wood, Traupmann & Hoy, 1984).While demographic factors make sustained relationships possible, economic, historic and social forces shape relationships and give them their unique texture. This combination of longevity and rapid social change also creates unique challenges and opportunities for those actually engaged as parents and adult children as well as educators, practitioners and researchers working with multigenerational families. Due to the complexity of the issues, it is particularly important to take a developmental, life course perspective, taking into account individual and family time and circumstances as well as historical or cohort effects.Marital Satisfaction and Parental Well-beingRelationships with adult children clearly affect parental well-being. In a study of midlife self-evaluation, Ryff, Lee, Essex and Schmutte (1994) point out the link between parents' views of themselves and their perceptions of their children's adjustment. A Canadian study of depression and older parents found that children's problems emerged as a more important predictor of depression than other variables, such as marital status and education, which often are studied in relation to depression and older adults (Pillemer & Suitor, 1991). …