Judging extreme forgivers: How victims are perceived when they forgive the unforgivable

Judy Eaton,Cole Norton,Jenniffer Olenewa

doi:10.1177/02697580211028021

Judy Eaton, Cole Norton + Show 1 more

Open Access

https://doi.org/10.1177/02697580211028021

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Abstract

When one individual commits a transgression or aggressive act against another, third parties often have expectations about how the victim should respond, even when they do not have any personal involvement in the event. When their justice expectations are violated, such as when a victim forgives the offender for an act that third parties deem too heinous to forgive, third parties may react in a way that is critical of the victim. This research examines how third-party observers react when victims forgive seemingly ‘unforgivable’ offences. Study 1, a scenario-based experiment, showed that although third parties were not directly critical of a forgiving victim, they did not agree with the decision to forgive. Study 2 replicated these findings and explored in more depth third parties’ justice-related feelings about the transgression and the victim, using both quantitative and qualitative data. Results suggest that although third parties are reluctant to directly criticize ‘extreme’ forgivers, they are not supportive of their decision to forgive. This could have implications for victims, who may interpret this disagreement with their choice as a lack of support.

Highlights

When one individual commits a transgression or aggressive act against another, third parties often have expectations about how the victim should respond, even when they do not have any personal involvement in the event
This research sets out to explain why an individual who was not directly harmed by an offence would be unsupportive of a victim who chooses to forgive this kind of extreme offence
In this research we examine how and why third parties respond to victims who forgive serious offences

Summary

Introduction

When one individual commits a transgression or aggressive act against another, third parties often have expectations about how the victim should respond, even when they do not have any personal involvement in the event. This research sets out to explain why an individual who was not directly harmed by an offence would be unsupportive of a victim who chooses to forgive this kind of extreme offence It seems especially counterintuitive for an uninvolved third party to criticize the victim’s forgiving response when the victim is making a seemingly positive gesture that could have positive personal benefits. There is a considerable amount of literature on third-party responses to offenders and punishment, there are gaps in our understanding of the emotional reactions of third parties to victims themselves (Gromet, 2012) This is an important issue for victims, because there may be instances where victims may want to forgive the transgressor but are reluctant to do so publicly because they fear that they will be judged negatively. As one victim who forgave her new husband for kidnapping and assaulting two women said, ‘[It’s] hard to feel pressure to hate when it [isn’t] what [you] feel’ (Moroney, 2012: 304)

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