“It’s a lot more like family Sunday dinner than people think”: Community, pleasure, and other motivations for group sex

Abstract

Group sex (i.e., sex involving four or more simultaneous partners) is a prevalent but stigmatized sexual behaviour. People assume that group sex centers around self-focused pleasure/physical gratification and that accordingly, this must be the primary motivation people have for engaging in group sex. Yet emerging research on group sex, as well as broader sexuality research and theory, suggests that group sex motivations are multifaceted and, for many, tied to community and belonging. In the present study, we focus on people’s reasons for engaging in group sex. We recruited twenty participants of diverse genders, sexual identities/orientations, ages (≥18 years), abilities, and group sex communities for individual interviews in southwestern British Columbia. We found that participants had engaged in group sex for a plurality of reasons, including their desire for novelty, sexual exploration, spirituality, and their upbringing. Importantly, many were motivated to have group sex by their belonging and acceptance in communities of like-minded individuals that embraced sex-positive principles and values. Pleasure was also an important motivator and was described in multifaceted ways and was intertwined with sexual empowerment, emotional vulnerability, and feelings of connection and intimacy. These findings shed light on an understudied aspect of group sex – that is, why people have it – and challenge the assumption that group sex is entirely motivated by self-focused desire for physical pleasure/gratification. Instead, they highlight how group sex motivation can be multifaceted and community focused.