Abstract
Reviewed by: I Am J Claire Gross Beam, Cris . I Am J. Little, 2011. [352p]. ISBN 978-0-316-05361-7 $16.99 Reviewed from galleys R* Gr. 9-12. J, an aspiring photographer, has “never looked the way he felt inside.” Despite possessing a female appearance and genitals, he knows he’s male; finding a language that explains who he is to his family and friends, however, all of whom see him as female, is the challenge and the journey treated in this minutely observed debut novel. Trapped in a body that isn’t his, in an unhealthy friendship with self-involved dancer (and cutter) Melissa, in a home with parents who, even when they’re trying to accept him, end a “we love you no matter what” speech with “you’ll always be my baby girl,” J reaches his breaking point: he runs away, ending up in a shelter for GLBT youth that connects him to the people and ideas he needs to envision a happy future for himself. The novel’s greatest strengths are J’s voice and his clearly articulated perspective. The tone is believably histrionic, perfectly attuned to adolescence—running away/finding a girlfriend/taking testosterone will solve everything; the minimum three-month period of required therapy before J can start taking T is forever—and even readers with little familiarity with transgender issues [End Page 269] will find plenty to relate to on an emotional level. At the same time, none of the very real challenges J faces—in matters ranging from finding a public restroom where he won’t be harassed or worse to the painful reactions of his parents—are trivialized; life may get better for J as the world changes and he grows up, but that’s not what he faces now. Still, Beam concludes on a hopeful note, with J plugged into a community of transgender teens and twentysomethings willing to befriend and mentor him, giving readers a sense of the world opening up with fresh possibility. A wealth of print and online resources for information and support are appended. [End Page 270] Copyright © 2011 The Board of Trustees of the University of Illinois
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