How to kiss and make-up (or not!): Postconflict behavior and affective recovery from conflict.

Abstract

We designed 3 studies to identify postconflict behaviors that aid or hinder couple partners' emotional recoveries from their conflicts. For Study 1, we created a codebook of 18 postconflict behaviors, derived from 230 participants' daily descriptions of reconciliation efforts over a 3-week period. In Study 2, 340 MTurk participants used a checklist to report which of the 18 behaviors they engaged in following their most recent conflict with their partner. An orthogonal factor analysis revealed four dimensions of postconflict behavior: avoidance (e.g., sulk/withdraw), active repair (e.g., apologize), gain a new perspective (e.g., seek help from friends), and let go (e.g., drop the conflict). In Study 3, 226 cohabiting couples completed a 2-week diary for which they reported on their postconflict reconciliation strategies. Results revealed that postconflict behavior dimensions active repair and gain a new perspective predicted better postconflict residual affective recovery on days with conflict. In contrast, avoidance predicted poorer affective recovery on days with conflict. These results suggest that couples' behavior after conflict can facilitate or inhibit them from reconnecting intimately. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2020 APA, all rights reserved).