Gay Fathers on the Margins: Race, Class, Marital Status, and Pathway to Parenthood

Abstract

ObjectiveTo investigate stratification within gay fatherhood communities.BackgroundAs laws and attitudes have become friendlier to queer families in recent decades, gay fathers have experienced increased visibility in and through both media and scholarship. However, this visibility has been distributed unevenly along normative patterns of marital status, race, class, and kinship.MethodParticipant observation of gay fathers groups was conducted in California, Texas, and Utah over a period of 61 months. Using theoretical sampling of group members, 56 gay fathers also participated in semistructured interviews. Themes were identified and refined through a 3‐stage iterative coding process, consistent with a grounded theory approach.ResultsFindings suggest that single gay fathers, gay fathers of color, and gay fathers who had children in heterosexual contexts occupy marginalized statuses within the gay fatherhood community. Gay fathers develop distinct mechanisms of resilience to respond to the challenges associated with their marginalization.ConclusionThe experiences of gay fathers on the margins highlight the negative consequences of gay fatherhood discourses that reproduce family normativity. The resources available through gay parenting groups simultaneously played a role in gay fathers' well‐being, resilience, and marginalization.ImplicationsEfforts to expand opportunities for gay families should consider coalitions with other marginalized family forms. Gay parents who had children in heterosexual unions should be specifically targeted through gay parenting outreach.