Editorial

Abstract

The American family has greatly changed in the past several generations. The move away from the farms to the huge metropolitan complexes has broken the traditional and ancient family pattern. Because of economic necessity, many families move from one city to another every few years, leaving behind friends and close ties. Restless families simply pack up bag and baggage and move from one coast to another or from North to South in search of better living conditions. This nuclear family, consisting of husband and wife and children, living alone and far distant from grandparents and close relatives, is “on its own.” In former times, expectant mothers relied upon other members of the family for help and emotional support. As Dr. Lawrence Frank says, “There were more laps for comfort.” The laps today are professional consulting rooms and classes for parents where husbands and wives eagerly exchange their hopes and fears. At best, friendly teachers of parent classes or doctors and nurses in clinics or private offices cannot take the place of the deep relationships of a closely knit family. The father has regained an important role in childbearing by these radical social changes. Because the nuclear family is separated from grandmothers, aunts and female cousins, he has taken upon himself a new, manly role, which was formerly the province of the now far distant womanfolk of the family. Husband and wife in the nuclear family have developed a close relationship which the popular magazines have called “togetherness.” In this new role, the wife often looks to the husband for emotional and physical support during pregnancy and labor. The growing number of husbands attending parents classes is an index of this trend. These men want to know all about pregnancy and the three stages of labor. They want to know what happens in the hospital and frequently they want to be with their wives during the long hours of labor. Some want to be in the delivery room. Administrative rules, promulgated for efficiency and safety, may in these days of the nuclear family have a serious traumatic effect. Husbands and wives may not have the privilege of being together during labor and delivery because “it's against the law;” or because doctors and nurses may feel threatened by the presence of the father in the labor and delivery rooms. They do not know how to put his natural talents to work. The wife who wants her husband with her does so because she needs his emotional and physical support. He, too, often needs to feel involved. As the articles in this issue of the Bulletin indicate, for these parents childbearing is more rewarding because they have been together. Some enthusiasts, because of their satisfying experience, would require that all husbands and wives be together. This well-meaning enthusiasm can be destructive of the husband-wife relationship. Some wives do not wish to have their husbands in the labor and delivery room with them. Some husbands have no desire to be present. A number of factors must be considered, including cultural background, emotional maturity, pain threshold, etc. Psychologists warn that the same husbands may be greatly disturbed by seeing their wife in utter concentration on herself and her physical functions. Some wives have good reason to desire deep anesthetic and to want to wake up and see their baby and their husbands after “it's all over.” Modern medicine can make either choice possible — but the choice should be that of the parents.