Eating Phở with My Grandpa, and: The Secret of Hoa Sen

Abstract

Eating Phở with My Grandpa, and: The Secret of Hoa Sen Nguyen Phan Que Mai (bio) Translated by Nguyen Phan Que Mai and Bruce Weigl (bio) Eating Phở with My Grandpa for my grandfather, killed in 1954 in the Land Reform Movement of North Vietnam A man knocked at the door of my dreamand poked his mud-smeared face through the layers of mist.“I am hungry,” he said, and proceeded to my tablecovered with food I was offering to my ancestors on the occasion of Tết.The smoldering bunch of incense suddenly flared up, its billowingsmoke blurred my eyes so I couldn’t see how the man looked.“Nobody offers phở to ancestors,” he laughedand slurped down a spoonful of my soup,to which his head nodded in approval.As he ate the white strings of noodles and the thin slices of beef,I wanted to tell him how my mother had taught meto use instinct to measure the right amount of cinnamon, anise, ginger, and onions,to cook the soup base,but invisible fingers forced my mouth to close,and I saw the steam from the man’s bowlroll down his face like tearsto clear his skin and my mind of mudand his face emerged out of the mistso I could put my fingers to my lipsand touch the name of my grandpa. Note Tết is Vietnamese New Year, celebrated on the first day of the Lunar Calendar Year. Phở is the most famous dish of Vietnam—noodle soup cooked with chicken or beef and spices. It is served hot with fresh Vietnamese mints, chilies, bean paste, and lemons. [End Page 77] The Secret of Hoa Sen The eyelid of night lifted me onto a sampan,floating among the humming lotus.Hoa sen; my darling called out their nameso their perfume blossomed onto his lips,unveiling the mist of a worldthat I didn’t know existed. The hoa sen swayed, shivered, breathless.“Hold me,” he said, as if from another life. When I reached for the world of his face,I could taste our longing on his skin,glistening with a new sunrising between us. Only the hoa senwitnessed how I becamethe flowerthat trembled on the chest of light. [End Page 78] Nguyen Phan Que Mai Nguyen Phan Que Mai is the author of three poetry collections and has won some of the most prestigious literary awards from Vietnam, including Poetry of the Year Award from the Hanoi Writers Association, and First Prize of the “Poetry about Hanoi 2008–2010” competition from Vietnam’s Literature Newspaper and the Hanoi Radio & Television. She was a visiting writer of Hong Kong Baptist University’s 2012 International Writers Workshop and Distinguished Asian Writer and Guest Panelist of Silliman University’s 51st National Writers Workshop in the Philippines. Her forthcoming poetry collection is The Secret of Hoa Sen (BOA Editions). Bruce Weigl Bruce Weigl is the author of thirteen poetry collections and the best-selling memoir Circle of Hanh. He has received many literary awards, including the Poet’s Prize from the Academy of American Poets and the Paterson Poetry Prize, awards from the nea and Yaddo Foundation, and two Pushcart Prizes. Having fought in the American War in Vietnam, he has been working for more than twenty years to promote mutual understanding and reconciliation between Vietnam and the United States through literature and cultural exchanges. His most recent poetry collection is The Abundance of Nothing, a Pulitzer Prize finalist. Copyright © 2014 University of Nebraska Press