Dependency, Self-Criticism, and Mothers' Responses to Adolescent Sons' Autonomy and Competence

Abstract

A previous study found that dependency was associated with mothers' reacting punitively to independent behavior of their adolescent daughters and that self-criticism was associated with punitive and controlling responses to adolescent daughters. To extend these findings to mother–son relationships, the present study examined relations between personality and parenting behavior in 78 mothers of adolescent boys. Mothers completed measures of dependency and self-criticism and of baseline affect, and then were given experimentally manipulated results of the son's “initial assessment of problem-solving ability” (competence) and choice of discussion partner. Affect was assessed again. Mothers “coached” sons on computer problem-solving puzzles. Dependency was associated with mothers' giving fewer explicit commands and less negative feedback to (1) sons who were described as high in competence and who chose someone else as discussion partner and (2) sons who were described as average in competence and who chose the mother as discussion partner. It was concluded that mothers high in dependency relate to competent sons in ways that encourage independence, but relate to their less competent sons in ways that may foster dependency, by thwarting attempts at autonomy.