Abstract
In this article I use autoethnographic method to assess two situations in which my kink identity and my non-monogamous identity clash with my role as a university teacher. Both identities are norm-breaking and stigmatized. They are coded as private in contrast to the professional ideal of the teacher. I ask how it affects me to keep part of my lived reality hidden and discuss what conflicts are obscured when some perspectives cannot be voiced.I also ask how students are affected when the university presents itself as more homogenic then it really is.
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