Abstract
Islamic-based secondary schools, with a boarding school education concept, aim to train children to deepen their knowledge of religion. In reality, boarding schools are the trigger for widespread cases of bullying. Busy activities at school and continued rote activities in the dormitory create boredom and pressure for students. This becomes a stimulus for emotional explosions for students and female students. This research aims to describe the findings of the assertive level abilities of santriwan and santriwati based on gender differences, because life in the dormitory is led by ustad and ustadzah with different characters. Apart from that, it describes an understanding of the form of an assertive attitude and reflects the feelings of santri and female students in being assertive. The mix method research method includes qualitative and quantitative. Qualitative descriptive data analysis activities include collecting data in in-depth interviews, observation and assertive scales, reflecting on experiences and at the same time training students. The research subjects were 80 people consisting of 2 classes, namely class VII and VIII with a gender division of 37 santri and 43 santriwati. The researcher carried out data triangulation, both time, place and data until the data was saturated to process the interview data. Research findings show that students are more able to be assertive by avoiding situations they don't like, refusing with the word "don't want to", because they are afraid of the rules and being angry with the ustad. female students have a weak assertive ability to refuse, because they are embarrassed and feel loyal to their friendship group, but some of the female students are very firm in refusing and reporting threatening and unpleasant situations to the ustadzah. In conclusion, a form of assertive training is needed for self-strength and self-confidence for students and female students to avoid bullying.
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