Abstract
The article describes the development of adolescents for a sense of self in a lesbian home, in order to compile guidelines for lesbian parents as well as pastoral counsellors to help and guide adolescents to develop a healthy sense of self. From the research results, it appears that there are certain positive and negative aspects of a lesbian home that influence adolescents’ sense of self. Where both parents are involved with the adolescents, share household duties equally and have a quality relationship with each other and the adolescents, the adolescents are generally well-adapted, happy and able to handle challenges in order to develop a healthy sense of self. The positive influence that Christian religious certainty has on the overall development of the adolescents was also confirmed by this study. On the other hand, adolescents experience particular aspects as challenging and impeding in their development of a healthy sense of self: Conflict and criticism from the companion parents are humiliating and destructive. Stigmatising, teasing and rejection from the hetero-normative society, as a result of their parents’ sexual orientation, appear to be the largest obstacles in their psychosocial development. They react in a shy, negative and evasive way to the stigmatisation and withdraw themselves from situations that could be painful and humiliating. It also appears that the absence of a father figure and financial tension in lesbian families are impeding the adolescents’ healthy development of a sense of self.
Highlights
Een van die belangrikste veranderinge wat die moderne gesin ondergaan het, is die verandering in gesinstrukture (Kottak 2010:290, 2008:409; Larney 2009:59; Lamanna & Riedmann 2009:14)
Johnson en O’Conner (2001:146) wat die boek, For lesbian parents, vanuit hul persoonlike ervaring as lesbiese ouers geskryf het, erken dat die afwesigheid van die vaderfiguur in die lesbiese ouerhuis ’n belangrike knelpunt is
Shaffer en Kipp (2007:475) sluit hierby aan en meen dat die komplekse proses van die ontwikkeling van ’n gesonde sin vir self en ’n gevoel van selfwaarde reeds tydens die babajare begin en grootliks beïnvloed word deur die gehegtheidsbande wat daar tussen die baba en sy of haar primêre versorger gesluit word
Summary
Adolessente se ervaring binne ’n lesbiese ouerhuis: ’n Pastorale-Gestaltteoretiese hulpverlening. It appears that there are certain positive and negative aspects of a lesbian home that influence adolescents’ sense of self. Where both parents are involved with the adolescents, share household duties and have a quality relationship with each other and the adolescents, the adolescents are generally well-adapted, happy and able to handle challenges in order to develop a healthy sense of self. Die doel van hierdie artikel is om krities te vra na die ervaring van adolessente binne ’n lesbiese ouerhuis en hoe lesbiese ouerskap-gesinne adolessente se ontwikkeling van ’n sin vir self raak. Die onderwerp is vanuit sowel ’n pastorale basisteorie (normatiewe perspektief) as ’n Gestaltteoretiese perspektief (paradigmatiese perspektief) bestudeer. ’n Kwalitatiewe benadering is vir die doel van hierdie studie gevolg, met semigestruktureerde onderhoudvoering met onderskeidelik die adolessente en hul ouers
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